Saturday, August 22, 2009

Day Four, Feelin' Blah

I am up WAY too early. My cats woke me up around 5:30 and I couldn't fall asleep. I was motivated to do some organizing, so that was a good start to the day, at least.

Thank you guys for your comments on my post about late night eating. I wish it was as easy as just saying, "I'm not going to eat at night" or saying, "tonight I might indulge, but tomorrow I won't". Example: all day yesterday I listened to my body, which wanted mostly healthy foods, plus a few dark chocolate chips. Even at dinner I listened to my body and stopped when I was full, because I was out with my parents and sweetheart and knew we'd get dessert after. I thoroughly enjoyed my dessert, which was eaten around 7:00 at night, but then later I really, really wanted a piece of the homemade carrot cake we have in the house. And I had one. And I wasn't hungry when I ate it, it was for purely emotional reasons that I indulged. And now, many hours later, my tummy hurts.

The thing is, just reasoning with late-night eating doesn't work for me. I don't just say, "jeez, obviously you're not hungry and you know you're going to feel off if you eat this treat late at night", because it's like some part of me wants to rebel and eat it anyway. It seems like it's become a habit.

I know myself too well to think I can just say, "that's it, no eating past 8:00 pm". In fact, that's exactly what I don't want to do. You know they say when you start to eat healthy you should add in healthier foods, not just remove the stuff you already love? I think I need to add in things to my night time routine. Not food, of course, but other ways of comforting and nurturing myself. Also, the boyfriend and I have both agreed that we've fallen into a pattern of too much late night indulging, and once the cake we have now is gone we're going to ease up on desserty stuff, though of course I'm not going to restrict myself from having treats.

Late night eating for me is comfort and emotionally based. I don't want to remove all sweets from my house. I don't want to set another restriction on myself. I want to eat when I'm hungry. I want to listen to my body. But I think to really do that I need an action plan for dealing with late night eating. I've learned various techniques from the many books I've read, so I'm going to have to sit with this and figure out what I think might work for me, then try it. I also need to find something to replace late night eating with - a non food reward or ritual.

What do you guys do to reward and comfort yourself - something that is cheap and non-food related!

I would like to say, though, that overall since I've decided I'm not putting myself on any diets and trying to be loving towards myself, I've felt better emotionally about my looks and weight. Imagine what we'd all be capable of if we stopped wasting time on worrying about what our butt looked like?

6 comments:

  1. I'm glad that you're emotionally feeling better about your looks! It's already an improvement from the dieting phase. Try not to restrict yourself when it comes to food, but just watch portion size.

    When i want to reward myself without spending ANY cash, I go through my gift cards that I've collected as presents over time and spend them. :D It's pretty fun, and free too! If I want to spend a little bit of my own money, I usually go to the book store. I love to read.

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  2. I loved this post! I struggled a bit too yesterday - old dieting feelings came into play:(

    One thing that is a non-food related comfort for me is to just sit and read! I don't often get to really buckle down with a good book and when I do find the time, it is so refreshing to escape into "another world" for a while.

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  3. Ah, Marisa beat me to it- reading is so relaxing for me. Love magazines! Especially mental cotton-candy like In Touch :-D <3

    The whole emotional snacking/eating issue is infinitely complex. If you are obsessing over a craving, there's no reasoning with that.

    I know that the following does NOT work for many people, but in a pinch it works for me. I make myself a REALLY, REALLY yummy but THICK smoothie and dress it up a bit (sprinkle of shredded coconut, or cacao nibs perhaps) and I'll eat it in a bowl with a spoon. It is ENORMOUSLY filling for few calories. And it's gratifying. I find it harder to eat for emotional reasons if my belly is so full it's about to explode. I have no idea if this helps you, but perhaps next time you get the munchies you can give it a try and please let me know the outcome.

    I'm following your story with a lot of interest and I'm rooting for you to succeed! :-)

    Deb

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  4. I have the dessert habit after dinner, but I always try to make it somewhat "healthy" and low-cal. Like Deb above, I'll do a fluffy smoothie, but sometimes, I just need more substance, and so I'll have a bowl of oatmeal or a baked sweet potato. For some reason, I just need a few carbs before bed. I cannot sleep on an empty stomach.

    So, give me carbs and some good reading material, and I'm a happy girl. :)

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  5. Hey there- how's it going? We're here hoping that you're managing ok. Remember that there are good days and bad days.

    Deb

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  6. paint my toes a fun color. listen to a podcast, go for a walk. put on some makeup and meet some friends.

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